From jeff@spundreams.net.nospam Mon Apr 30 11:36:42 2001 Date: Fri, 16 Mar 2001 22:56:05 -0600 From: Jeff Huo Newsgroups: rec.arts.sf.written.robert-jordan Subject: Re: TAN: That's _Professor_ OilCan to You, Punk In article <3ab18342.95043369@news.earthlink.net>, orzelc@earthlink.net says... > > For those who care: > > As of tomorrow morning when I put the signed contract in the mail, I > have managed to extend my stay in the Ivory Tower by at least a few > more years, with a possibility for prolonging it indefinitely. Hip! Hip! Hurrah! > I'm accepting a tenure-track position at Union College in Schenectady, > NY. Starting in September, I'll be a professor of physics, > inflicting^W imparting knowledge to a whole new generation of > students. Pre-meds. You do realize you will probably be saddled with the joyous task of teaching pre-meds physics? "Dr. Orzel, could you please just give me one more point?" "Dr. Orzel, that test problem wasn't in the review session..." "Dr. Orzel, see, I *meant* to write F=ma..." "Dr. Orzel, I really think that test problem wasn't fair..." "Dr. Orzel, can't I get more partial credit? He got some..." "Dr. Orzel, why did you cut off B- at that curve point?" "Dr. Orzel, why are you holding that scythe and cackling? And who is this 'Gozer the Destroyer' you keep referring to?" My sincere condolences. I mean, sure, it'll be fun the first few-dozen times you send some whiny spoiled punk's white-coat-and-green-back-washed dreams down in flames, but after a while sporking llamas in a dumpster loses it's charm... "Dr. Orzel, isn't that worth more partial credit than that?" "Dr. Orzel, is there any way I can make up those extra points?" "Dr. Orzel, can't I get a makeup problem set?" "Dr. Orzel, you didn't say that was going to be on the test..." "Dr. Orzel, where and how far up exactly did you want me to shove that used toilet plunger and can I get extra credit if I do?" Or just imagine labs. "Dr. Orzel, could I please borrow a ruler? Oh, and a pencil?" "Dr. Orzel, my handwriting *is* readable in that notebook..." "Dr. Orzel, why doesn't that count as an acceptable conclusion?" "Dr. Orzel, why can't I get a makeup lab?" "Dr. Orzel, I didn't mean to start that fire!" "Dr. Orzel, our TA keeps screaming 'Zathras warned Zathras, but Zathras never listens to Zathras!' ..." .... Boy, I am so sorry for you, Chad... -Jeff Who thinks his physics teachers Kicked Ass. (tm) -- Jeff Huo | jeff@spundreams.net.nospam (remove nospam) U. Michigan Med | http://www.spundreams.net/~jeff New to the group? Welcome! Please read http://www.landfield.com/faqs/sf/robert-jordan-faq/ http://www.spundreams.net/~jeff/rasfwrjians2.html