From jeff@grcmail.grc.uri.edu Mon Jan 29 12:10:13 2001 Date: Fri, 07 Jan 2000 15:29:54 -0800 From: Jeff Carroll Newsgroups: rec.arts.sf.written.robert-jordan Subject: An Original WOT Short, Short Story (read if bored) What follows is a (hopefully) slightly humorous story I came up with in the shower this morning while I was thinking about how much needed to happen before the end of this series. Unless a scene happens like the one I am about to describe (not bloody likely) I see no way that all of this will happen in 3 books or less... Basically, it just irritates me that you have all these characters who are/were supposedly great friends, and not one of them knows what's going on in each other's lives, all of which is certainly important and could help in the last battle. I know that's the way Jordan is writing it to be, but come on.... why is everyone so damn secretive... And oh yes.. there are some MAJOR SPOILERS in case you haven't read all the books..... Keep in mind.. I am not a writer (as you will definitely be able to tell), .. this is just for fun... and I am bored at the moment... ---------------------- A COMPLETELY FICTIONAL WHEEL OF TIME STORY: THE PARTY By Jeff Carroll (jeff@grcmail.grc.uri.edu) The thin vertical slash of light appeared and seemed to turn and rotate into a view of another place. Rand stepped out from his rooms in Cairhien into the once familiar green in the middle of Emond's field. If Perrin had not actually told him about all the changes, he would never have believed it.. but it was all true... Two poles rose directly in front of him, one with a wolf's head banner, and the other bearing the image of a red eagle. More houses had been built, many in brick and other foreign styles. The tales he had heard of immigrants were apparently true as well. Right now it was early evening, and there was only one thing on Rand's mind however. "Are you going to show me what is in that letter now, Rand?" Min's voice surprised him. She had come with him, of course. There was seldom anywhere he went that she did not anymore. He supposed it was for the best. However, he did not need her question to remind him of the letter he held in his hand. "Ok, Min. I am as puzzled as anyone, but I feel you should read it before we go any further. Here you go". Min took the letter, opened it and read silently to herself. Dear Rand, It's been quite a while, but I have just found out where you could be reached. I hope you have time to join us for a Party at the Winespring Inn this Friday evening. Please feel free to bring a guest or two. Love, Tam, your da. "This is certainly very odd, you woolheaded sheepherder." Min said. Rand laughed. For all of her viewings, Min had a very good grasp on the obvious. "I know Min, but I feel I've been away from home too long. I had to come. There has to be a reason for this." Rand said, and started walking toward the two-story Winespring Inn. Master Al'vere's Inn had been the largest building in the Two Rivers until recently. Now it seemed rather small. As he approached the door, Rand heard quite a party going on inside. With one last breath, he grasped the door handle and pulled.... The scene that greeted him could have been enough to send him into shock. Only his quick grasp of saidin, immersed in the void, was able to keep him from losing his mind. Almost anyone who had some role of importance in his life, even people he did not know, were gathered in the common room of the Inn. There was Egwene, Perrin, Elayne, Aviendha, Wise Ones, and many others. Tam was the first to approach him. "Well, it is good to see you again, my boy!! Where have you been? What have you been doing?? Please tell me!" Everybody in the room suddenly started getting very uncomfortable, coughing to themselves and looking everywhere but where Tam and Rand stood facing each other. Rand swallowed his initial disbelief and finally spoke. "Tam... you.. you really don't know?" "Know what, lad?" Rand suddenly snapped. "Light, Perrin!!! Blood and ashes!! You are the Lord of the Two Rivers.. You spent months here. You never told my bloody father I'm the bloody Dragon Reborn???! Light, what were you thinking?" Perrin rose to defend himself "Rand, I didn't want to upset anyone. It's your secret to tell, after all." "But Perrin, your army of Two-Rivers men seemed to have no trouble handling this fact. You think my own father wouldn't be able to take the news? Which reminds me.... Tam? I have something to tell you." Tam's mouth hung wide open. Rand continued "Tam, I know that you are not my true father. You should never have kept that from me. Light, I look like a bloody Aielman! How did you explain that to everyone in the village?" Tam suddenly fainted. As he was about to hit the floor, Rand held him in flows of Air and gently lifted him to a corner. "Blood and Bloody Ashes, people! Does anyone else have any secrets they would like to get out!! This is madness!" Rand exclaimed. Suddenly Aviendha sprang up off the floor, her face beat red. "Rand al'Thor! I have been keeping this from you ever since the Aiel Waste. I am in love with you. My near sisters Min and Elayne are also, we wish to become sister-wives. I cannot bear to hide this any longer. I have toh to you, Rand al'Thor." "Enough of the bloody toh, Aviendha!" Rand exclaimed. "Light, I am in love with you too. And Elayne.. and Min... and.. WAIT.. you all bloody knew about this????" Min intervened quickly "Yes Rand. I had a viewing. Please don't be angry. I had a viewing that I would have to share you with two other women." Egwene suddenly piped up "Two other women? It is starting to make sense... I had a dream of you Rand, with 3 women and you on a boat. You were dead, I think." Nynaeve came beside Egwene. "Egwene, that is very familiar. If I recall correctly, Nicola had a foretelling of much the same thing. After the battle was done, three women on a boat." Rand began to become aware of his future. Light, did this mean he would definitely die at Tarmon Gaidon? "Speaking of prophecies.." Egwene continued "I have had many more prophetic dreams. Would you care to hear them?" Perrin interrupted "I too have had some prophecies of sorts. In my dreams." "Dreams??" Egwene replied. "What kind of dreams? I have seen you in my dreams many times Perrin... Do you.. I mean.. Can you.. Light, are you a dreamwalker?" Perrin was taken aback. "A dreamwalker? Blood and ashes, Egwene! I want nothing to do with the bloody Power!! Or the wolves!! I never bloody asked for any of this!" "The wolves!" Rand screamed, pointing at Perrin. "Of course.. the bloody wolves... You and your yellow eyes. All those bloody wolves jumping to the rescue all the time. Your bloody vision and sense of smell. It all makes sense. What about these wolves Perrin? Tell me now!" Perrin sighed. "It was my secret. Mine and Faile's. But light.. for the life of me I can't think of any good reason whatsoever why I kept it a secret this whole time. Well, you see, I met this guy names Elyas Machera that one time we got separated after leaving Emond's field. Egwene, you remember, you were with me. You even met Aram here when we stayed with the Tinkers." "Aram?" Egwene said slowly. "is that you?" From behind Perrin, a young man dressed in violently bright colors stepped up. "Nice to see you again, Egwene. You look much older and wiser than when we last met. And I see you have taken to wearing shawls." For the first time, Rand seemed to notice Egwene's shawl. He had seen the likes of it before. He burst out in another fit of rage. "THE BLOODY AMYRLIN!!!! BLOOD AND BLOODY ASHES, EGWENE! You and all those bloody rebel Aes Sedai are sitting on your asses watching the grass grow, when you could be helping me!!! LIGHT!" The Wise One began to shift around where they sat on the ground. Rand noticed. "Don't tell me you bloody knew about this too, and didn't tell me!!! Amys??? Bair??? And while we're on the subject again, how do you do this talking in dreams, and why do you not let me make use of this!!! Light, does ANYBODY want me to win the last battle???" "We promised to keep Egwene's secret, Car'a'carn. It is not our fault." Amys said. "And I am still interested about this dreamwalking you do, Perrin." Egwene added. "Yes, let us hear about this too." Bair agreed. Perrin sighed. He could not run from a room full of Aes Sedai. "OK, I'll bloody tell you. Sometimes, when I sleep, I let myself go to the Wolf Dream. I can do anything I want in the Wolf Dream, it is like the real world, only not. There are no rules. The wolves are there. I can talk to them there too." "Perrin, this sounds like Tel'aran'rhiod, where dreamwalkers go. The world has a reflection there, but it is infinitely malleable. No humans exist, only those who are dreamwalkers." "Is there a way to go to this place without sleeping?" Rand interjected. "That is not permitted, Car'a'carn" Amys replied. "It is evil. We do not know why, but we do not do it." "Well, do you consider me evil then, Amys? For I believe that I surely have done this very thing. I go there sometimes. That is where I killed Ishamael, and Rahvin. I know it must be the same place. It is a strange reflection of the real world. And Egwene, this is where I found out where Salidar was. I spied on you. Not apurpose, but you happened to be in the Stone of tear at the same time I was. I overheard." "Of course!" Egwene replied. "It is all starting to make sense now. So Perrin... tell me..... Perrin?" Perrin didn't hear Egwene. He had taken to looking at something, or someone in the corner of the room. He pushed aside a few people until he found someone hiding in a corner. Rand did not recognize her, even after Perrin had pulled her into the middle of the room by a long braid. "WHAT IS THE MEANING OF THIS, HUSBAND!!???" Perrin's wife, Faile, exclaimed "First you set your eyes on that tramp Berelain! And now this yellow haired tart!!!" Without warning, Perrin growled like a rabid Wolf and backhanded Faile across the face. Gripping her neck in both hands, he made a quick jerking motion, snapping her neck in the process. She fell to the floor, limp. Perrin stopped growling, as Nynaeve came running to try and help. "Don't bother, Nynaeve. She's gone, and we're all the better for it. Damn bitch. And stop tugging that braid at me!!! GRRRRRRRRRR." Nynaeve stepped back quickly. Even Lan didn't dare move on Perrin at that moment. Perrin continued. "Moving on, I have seen this woman in the Wolf Dream, Tel'aran'rhiod or whatever you wish to call it. She warned me to avoid a dangerous man named Slayer. She kept me from entering a place called to Tower of Ghenji. Then she disappeared. I demand to know who you are, young woman, or I will rip the truth out of you." The woman slowly stood up. She was tall, with a long golden braid hanging down her back. She held a bow and a quiver full of silver arrows. "My name.... my name.. is Birgitte. Yes, I too have secrets that I have foolishly kept for no reason. I am the Birgitte of the stories, ripped from Tel'aran'rhiod physically by Moghedien. I am warder to Elayne Trakand, and I did you a great service Perrin, keeping you from that tower. As I told you then, it is the one portal from this world to the realm of the Aelfinn and the Eelfinn. Their evil is just as great as the dark one, just different. You would do well to thank me." "Wait a minute.." Rand said. "Tell me more of this new evil. I do not like being surprised. Should I expect an attack from these Finn people as well?" Birgitte was quick to reply "Oh no. I should say not. Their world is not a part of ours. No one truly knows where they exist. The same laws of time and our world do not apply in theirs. They are very interested in human thoughts, from what I have heard. I have never been to their world, but I know of those who have. Those who go to see the Aelfinn may ask three questions, but there is a price that we pay. The price of the bargain has been lost over time. Those who go to see the Eelfinn are not so lucky. Very few people have ever returned from their world. They grant 3 wishes, but the price to be paid can be deadly." "YOU DONT HAVE TO TELL ME!" came a voice from the door. Mat Cauthon was standing there in his broad brimmed hat, looking pretty worn out. "I have paid the price of visiting those people, and I still have no true answers to show for it." "Mat!" Rand said. "Light, you look like a building fell on you!" "As a matter of fact...." Mat replied. "one did. But that is beside the point. Birgitte, I have gained some gifts from these people, but I still have yet to get my answers to my questions. I must find a way to return there and burn those sons of goats for the tricksters they are!" "Of course. I see it now" Came another as of yet unheard voice from the other side of the room. Lan Mandragoran, uncrowned king of Malkier, ex-warder to Moiraine. His face looked carved from stone, for all the expression he ever showed. "This is where you gained your knowledge of battle and your ability to spout the old tongue at will." "And that bloody ter'angreal!!!!" Elayne squawked, then quickly covered up her mouth. Nynaeve was about to scold her for her language, but decided to keep quiet and merely tugged her braid instead. "Yeah, that's bloody flaming right. I did gain some gifts on the other side of that doorway, but I have yet to find out who the bloody Daughter of the Nine Moons is, why I'm supposed to marry her, or how I will give up half the light of the world to save the world. Flaming sons of goats!!! Give me my chance at revenge!!!" Mat was downright angry. "Did you say Daughter of the Nine Moons?" Egwene asked. "While I was a Seanchan captive, they kept telling me how the empress in the Court of the Nine Moons would have me as her personal slave one day. " "Seanchan?? Light!" Mat said. "And that bit about giving up half the light of the world... " Elayne interrupted... "I have been working out quite a few puzzles of my own lately. But I take that to mean something about your eyes." "Wait a minute, Elayne. I think I am just beginning to see something here." Egwene replied. "In one of my dreams, I saw Mat weighing one of his eyes on a balance scale. Together with that answer that Mat got, it looks like.. like...." "..like I'm going to lose an eye??? And marry some kind of Seanchan empress, or her daughter??? LIGHT!!! BLOODY BLOOD AND ASHES! I never asked for any of this!!!" Mat was almost hysterical. Perrin felt sympathetic. "I know how you feel, Mat. But thanks to Birgitte, I think we have a way to get back at those people. What was it you told me that time, Birgitte? A line from some children's game?" Before Birgitte could answer, Mat chimed in. "Courage to strengthen, fire to blind, music to dazzle, iron to bind. Snakes and Foxes, of course!! How did I not see this before. It was the snakey people who gave me answers, and the Fox people who gave me gifts. The children's game of Snakes and Foxes, there is no way to win except to cheat. All we need are those things, and we can win, I know it! We just need a way to get back to them. Those bloody doors only let me through once though.. and Moiraine died destroying the one from Rhuidean." "NO. SHE DIDN'T" This time it was Min who spoke, surprising everyone. "I have been thinking over a few things myself. All of my visions have always come true, or I have been certain they would, eventually. I have only had one vision that never came true, and it concerned Moiraine and... and somebody else." "No need to hide it child. I know. I am going to marry Moiraine." That voice was unmistakable. Thom Merrilin, the old wiry gleeman who Rand had first met at this very inn, it seemed so long ago. "Moiraine knew it too, she wrote me a letter before she died, knowing she would die, and I would come to save her. She knew it all." "I had a dream of you pulling Moiraine to safety, Thom. Light!" Egwene added. "Not only that, there is something else that gave me a clue" Min continued. "Whenever I see the group of you together, the image of a blackness with millions of lights swarming in it is always there.. But the more of you in one place, the greater the light's chances are of escaping the blackness. Moiraine was a part of that too. You all were. I didn't see it until now, but it is clear. All of you need to cooperate to win the last battle, including Moiraine, which means she is not dead." "But I felt the bond disappear. What else could it mean?" Lan asked, face as expressionless as ever. Elayne walked over to Lan with a young woman. Rand thought he recognized her. "Lan, the bond could have been broken if Moiraine was merely stilled, or burned out. This is Siuan Sanche." Lan didn't move or show any sign of expression at all. One of his eyes seemed to widen a bit more, which was about as much expression as anyone was about to get out of the man. "al'Lan Mandragoran, it is true. I am the ex-Amyrlin Siuan Sanche, and good friend to Moiraine. " Siuan said "Nynaeve healed stilling in both me and Leane. Stilling seems to have had some side effects. For instance, I now look young enough to be your daughter, but in truth I have had many more name days than you have. Many more. In fact, I'm not bound by the three oaths anymore, either." Elayne had been lost in thought as she listened to Siuan's speech, as if she had been putting something together. Finally she spoke. "Siuan, you have just started me thinking on something again. The kinswomen in Ebou Dar are all just as old or older than many Aes Sedai, yet I can clearly put an age to them. But that age is much younger than they truly are.. Much like your current situation... I had been thinking on this before, but now it's starting to make sense. I think I have figured it out. Aes Sedai lifespans... the ageless look... your stilling almost proves it... It's..." "....The Oath Rod that causes the ageless Aes Sedai look. It's about time someone figured it out, girl." That voice was deep and dark, full of contempt. The man who walked in started voices screaming in Rand's head about killing. It was Mazrim Taim, leader of Rand's Asha'man. Taim stepped into the middle of the room. "You pitiful so called Aes Sedai make me laugh. It has taken three thousand years, but one of you has finally figured it out. In the Age of Legends, we TRUE Aes Sedai used these rods to bind criminals against ever committing their crimes again, while at the same time giving them a recognizable ageless look to mark them criminals. You foolish women have been binding yourselves as criminals. We have been laughing at you for all these years. HA HA HA AH HA." "Taim, what do you mean, WE? How do you know all this???" Rand asked, more than briskly. "Taim, that may be the name I took, but it is not my name." Taim laughed to himself and continued. "You may call me Demandred." It took no more than a split second for Rand to seize saidin and shield the man from the source. He felt the goosebumps telling him the women in the room has also taken hold of the One Power. Demandred laughed to himself again. "Foolish children. I mean you no harm. Have I not allowed you all to go on about all your business. I surely could have killed you many times over by now, my Lord Dragon. In truth, I was ordered to help you by my Master, the Great Lord of the Dark. I do not understand why, of course. One does not question the Great Lord, one only obeys. To be honest, I have almost grown to like you. However I am not as weak as Asmodean. He was taught a lesson. I'm afraid he is no longer around to be taught much of anything." "You killed Asmodean, Taim?? I shall kill you!" Rand screamed. "My Lord Dragon" Demandred replied, coolly. "I surely could not possibly plant myself alongside you in Caemlyn if the traitor Asmodean, or should I say Jasin Natael, was still with you. He had to be done away with. As for killing him, I'm not inclined to say who actually did the deed. *cough*Graendal*cough*." "Jasin Natael?? Asmodean??? Light, Rand!! You had a Forsaken with us for months and you didn't tell anyone. How could you be so careless?!" exclaimed Egwene. Rand replied "Moiraine knew somehow and she didn't seem to disapprove much. It seems Moiraine knew a great deal more than anybody seems to realize." "It seems so." Thom Merrilin added. "Which brings us back to the question of how am I to save her? The light burn me, but I love the woman! We all certainly have courage to strengthen. And I most definitely have music to dazzle. What we need are fire to blind, and iron to bind." "That reminds me of another dream I had." Egwene said "Mat was watching a fireworks display, and he reached up and grabbed one out of the sky. I knew this would change everything. Mat, does this make any sense to you?" Mat stood thinking for a second. Finally he spoke "As with much this night, I am starting to make sense of things. I myself have thought of using fireworks as weapons. There is a way, I have used them before. In fact, that's how I was able to get into the Stone of Tear by myself. I just need to find an Illuminator. With that knowledge, I could certainly bring some fire to blind." "Aludra, Mat! Aludra." Thom Merrilin exclaimed. "The renegade Illuminator whose life you saved that one time. She was on her way to Ebou Dar last I saw her. She knows many secrets concerning fire, including these..." Suddenly a flame appeared in Thom's fingers, burning on a short stick of wood. "Light!" Mat said. "Fire to blind". "And if I am anything in this world that I am sure about, it is a blacksmith." Perrin stepped up proudly and surely. "If you need iron to bind, I will make what you need." "And I will be at your side, Lord Perrin." said Aram. Aram was seldom far from Perrin's side. That tickled another thought in the back of Egwene's mind. Suddenly, she cried out "LOOK OUT! Perrin!!!" Perrin barely had time to react before Aram's wolf-handled sword came swinging down upon him. The blade stopped an inch from Perrin's neck. Aram was frozen where he was. "Thank you, whoever saved me." Perrin said, barely able to breathe. Egwene walked up to Aram. "I should have realized it sooner. One of my dreams was of a man close to you, a tinker, a threat to you that you didn't see. Aram is a darkfriend." Aram spit at Egwene and spoke "Fools. The Great Lord will not stand for this. You are all fools. The Great Lord will save me." Demandred was quick to reply "You are the fool, young friend. You have failed the Dark Lord. He does not take kindly to failure. " Aram began weeping. "I didn't want to.. I really didn't... I had no choice... We were never going to find the bloody Song. The Way of the Leaf would have gotten us nowhere." "The Way of the Leaf. You have no idea how the Aiel have paid for forsaking the way of the leaf." Amys said, solemnly. "Yes Aram, it is true, you Tuath'an were once Aiel. But what is this of a Song?" Perrin joined the conversation. "The song. It is what the Tinkers dedicate their lives to finding. Myself, I don't believe there ever was a Song." "I believe you might be wrong, Perrin." Rand was a surprised to find himself speaking as everyone else. "When I lived through the eyes of my ancestors in the columns of Rhuidean, I saw a great field, with Aiel and Ogier singing. There was a creature.. Like the Green Man at the Eye of the World, and he was creating life. Plants growing as if time was passing so rapidly. Burn me, but if that wasn't the Song you speak of, I am not the Dragon Reborn." There was a commotion in the back of the room as a huge creature made his way to the center of the common room. Loial was Ogier. Half again as tall as even Rand, with eyes as big as teacups, his voiced boomed even while whispering. After some time, he spoke "I have been observing you all for some time. Ever since I first met these three ta'veren, I knew I would be at the center of something special. When you three are together, the pattern forms itself to make all right. All three of you being here together has caused so many secrets to come out, so many solutions to appear, that it is no wonder knowledge thought once lost should resurface again anew. Yes, I know the song, every Aiel knows the song. It is not any one song, but it is the act of us all singing together which brings life. Among Ogier, treesinging is a lost art. Very few even have the talent anymore. Working together, I believe we can set things right again. Perhaps even Avendesora with flourish once more." Perrin clapped his hand on the Ogier's arm. "Well, said my friend. We have all learned a great many things here tonight. We all have a course of action, a new found vision of what must be and how to do what must be done. We should never keep our secrets to ourselves again. I see the error of our ways now." Everyone began to cheer. A groggy Tam began to wake up. After regaining his composure, he walked up to Rand and spoke "My boy, I always knew you'd be something someday. But I need to know, why in the name of the light has everybody come here tonight?" Rand was clearly surprised at the question. "Tam, you sent me an invitation to a party." Tam shook his head. "I did no such thing, Lad. I think someone is playing games with you all." The whole room erupted in questions and murmurs. It seemed that everyone had gotten a similar invitation. Suddenly a voice seemed to boom out of nowhere. "BACK IN BOOK ONE I SAID I WOULD TAKE NO PART. I THINK I MUST HAVE BEEN SMOKING CRACK. YOU BLOODY WOOLHEADS WITH ALL YOUR BLOODY SECRETS. THE PATTERN SPINS OUT TA'VEREN TO GET THESE THINGS DONE. I SHOULD HAVE PICKED A GROUP OF PEOPLE FROM ARAD DOMAN. YOU TWO RIVERS PEOPLE ARE A BUNCH OF SHEEP BRAINED THICKHEADED LOUTS. HOW DID ANY OF YOU EXPECT TO WIN THE LAST BATTLE UNLESS YOU STARTED TELLING EACH OTHER WHAT YOU KNEW AND TRIED TO HELP EACH OTHER. YES, IT WAS I, THE CREATOR, WHO SENT YOU YOUR INVITATIONS. NOW WILL EVERYONE PLEASE SHUT UP AND LET ME GET SOME REST FOR THE NEXT 6 SPOKES OF THE WHEEL OF TIME???" "Yes, Creator!!" came the unanimous group reply. "OH AND ONE MORE THING. I DON'T USUALLY DO THIS, BUT..... DOES ANYONE WANT ME TO BRING FAILE BACK TO LIFE?" "Noooooooooo!!!!!!!!" responded the group. THE END.