Subject: Re: No, *I* am God of this NG! (was Re: TAN: Nervous posts) From: jsn@news.greennet.net (John S. Novak, III) Newsgroups: rec.arts.sf.written.robert-jordan Organization: Cynics Central On Tue, 13 Jul 1999 21:03:29 GMT, Drew Gillmore wrote: >Cause he's sort a like God in that he tells you what to do a lot and >doesn't really explain why he wants it done. He also got this one >chick pregnant wihout ever touching her. Categorically untrue. In fact, that's really one of the things that YHWH was never really able to explain to my satisfaction. "YH, old bean," I said to him one afternoon a few thousand years ago, "I really don't think this is going to win you any great supporters. Sure, impregnating a virgin is impressive to these folk, on a purely technical level. But it ain't just the technical aspects, babe, it's the _technique_. It's the _psychology_ behind it." "Er... I'm not sure I'm following you, JSN," he replied. YHWH always was rather slow on the uptake. "You have to think about this from the perspective of your _audience_. These people, unlike you, have very strong sex drives, and contrary to your belief, it _ain't_ just for procreation. Go look around a farmyard, some time. Yeah, they're going to be wowed for a while, maybe even for a generation. But once the novelty wears off, they're going to be asking all sorts of, er, penetrating questions, if you will." "Don't tease. Questions like what?" "Like, 'Why would YHWH go through all the trouble of impregnating a woman, without even bothering with the FUN PART?' you idiot!" It wasn't until I clued him in on the concept of the ecstatic vision that things really started looking up for him. Whereupon he gave St. Paul and St Augustine to the world. I don't know what I'm going to do with him. -- John S. Novak, III jsn@concentric.net The Humblest Man on the Net