From: surfbaud@waverider.co.uk.allyourclothes (Dave Hemming) Subject: Re: Insults Date: 2000/02/17 Newsgroups: rec.arts.sf.written.robert-jordan On Mon, 14 Feb 2000 14:24:16 -0500, mloy@topaz.iupui.edu (Mark Loy) vomited forth this magnum opus: >In article <8845s0$ghr$1@lure.pipex.net>, "Zharradan" > wrote: > >> Well personally i use an alias in newsgroups because its none of anyone >> else's business what my real name is, nor should it be. Posts here should be >> considered on their merit, not on a name. > > >Hmmm...you may have something here, Zharry...you don't mind if I call you >Zharry, do you? > >In fact, from this moment forward, I shall no longer be Mark A. Loy but >instead... > > > >"JIZZBONDO, THE MAGNIFICENT!!" Scene: The League of Super Second-Raters Clubhouse, aka Marty's Bar and Grill. LOGJAM and MYOPIA MAN are already present, drowning their sorrows in happy-hour specials. Enter WOLFRAM, who strikes a dramatic pose on the stairs. W: Ho, brave compatriots! Evil is once more permeating the city! LJ & MM exchange weary glances. L: Yeah. Hi. MM: Whatever. W: It's true! There is a new super-villain on the scene, and only we can thwart his evil plans! LJ: This isn't going to be like that whole VIVID thing again, is it? MM: Yeah, cause I really have better things to do with my time than battle deranged interior decorators. Again. LJ : You do? MM: Well... No. But there's a principle, here. LJ: Point taken. There have to be better things to do with ones time than battle madmen with no fashion sense. MM: Is that a crack? My agent assures me that fuschia capes are going to be really big this year! LJ: Errr... You know, I was going to be called VIVID at one point. MM : No! Get outta here! LJ: Really. But my agent convinced me it was one of those words that just sounds more ridiculous the more you say it. MM: Vivid... Vivid... I see what you mean. Besides, it doesn't really mesh well with your power. LJ: What does? It's not like I can destroy city blocks while clearing my throat. MM: Not your throat, anyway. W: AHEM! LJ: Huh? Oh, yeah. New threat. Gotcha. Do tell. W: His name is... JIZZBONDO THE MAGNIFICENT!!! MM: Eh? LJ: You're kidding. MM: Did you notice he just cleared his throat? I thought that was pretty funny, myself. On top of what we were just saying, I mean. LJ: Ha! I missed that. Good one, M.M. W : He is a THREAT to all that is PURE and TRUE! MM: He's a congressman? LJ: He's a sysadmin? W: He posts funny stuff under a Football thread on Usenet! LJ: Woah. MM: He must be stopped. W: YES!!! For if we are naught else, we are DEFENDERS of USENET! MM: And let's face it.... LJ: We aren't much else, at that. Why, yes - I have been drinking. Why do you ask? Dave -- "In the Happiness Factory, we grind out joy like sausage, and like sausage, we primarily rely on lips and assholes for our ingredient base." --The Elder Dan (crisper@best.com)