Date: Wed, 12 Jul 2000 22:17:04 -0500
From: Jeff Huo <jeff@spundreams.net.nospam>
Newsgroups: rec.arts.sf.written.robert-jordan
Subject: Re: TAN: The word is *FUCK* (was: Mea Culpa)


In article <MPG.13d6c619e83a5f06989862@news.erols.com>, 
cskollmann@erols.com says...
> Jeff Huo (jeff@spundreams.net.nospam) says...
> > (Might wanna keep that one in mind, for all you physics and bio
> > types, when (if you ever have the grave misfortune of) TAing a
> > pre-med class and you run into students with unhealthy fascinations
> > with firearms...)
> 
> Not for another year.  And by then I figure I'll be able to take any 
> of them that come after me.  ("Listen up, punk.  I'm in the fourth 
> year of a grad program, I have about $50 of discretionary money a 
> month while some of my friends are cashing in stock options, and my 
> thesis just got scooped.  I spend my weekends selling my body to 
> clinical trials.  Last time they started pumping me full of 
> androstenedione.  You think I'm afraid of your little pistol?  C'mon, 
> do it!  You want to get crazy, let's get crazy!  C'mon, let's really 
> look terror in the face...)
> 


You think _that's_ going to stop them? In the August 1998 
administration of the MCAT (see The Chronicle of Higher 
Education, August 23rd 1998 issue), someone charged into the test 
being run at the Masonic Auditorium in San Francisco with a _gun_ 
and demanded a copy of the MCAT. Realizing that if the gunman got 
away with the copies, everyone in the room would be forced to 
retake the exam (due to security being compromised), several 
test-takers sprang up and beat the bloody frick out of him.


Let's clarify something here; the un-armed test takers assaulted 
a man with a *gun*, to prevent him from taking a copy of the 
exam.


I'm sorry folks, I don't care how long I've been studying for an 
exam; if that mother has got a firearm and I got jack shit, 
somebody's life had better be at stake before I go try to catch a 
bullet. To not have to retake an exam ain't gonna cut it. But 
maybe that's just me.


< Chris is going to take the next dumbass idiot who tries to use 
equipment without proper training and shred the idiot's penis 
with a laboratory centrifuge >


> > (I mean, damn, those things cost money...rotors are expensive...and
> > you'll be cleaning little bits of ground beef off of every freaking
> > surface of the lab within thirty feet of the machine...not to 
> > mention the shrapnel when the rotor gags on hair and flesh and 
> > explodes...or the resulting fire...)
> 
> We had a microfuge explode at MGH a couple months ago.  Through 
> extreme luck, nobody was hurt, although one tech did have shrapnel 
> pass a few inches from her face.  Not my lab, thankfully.  They've 
> recalled the model.
> 


<looks around nervously> What model?


> > (And anyway, what if the fellow is a woman?
> > 
> > <* Brain comes to a screaming, and I do mean screaming, halt
> > as a quick mental inventory of the lab's equipment reveals a
> > whole hell of a lot of things Chris could do...*>
> 
> Labs can be dangerous places, especially when you piss off the person 
> who spends more time there than you do...Muahahahahaha <coughcough>
> 


(Mr. Kollmann! This is the Police! Step away from the 10,000 RPM 
Sonicator...and the 2000 V electrophoresis power unit...and the
auto-cryosectioner...the Cobalt Irradiation Source...the
methyl mercury...the botulium toxin...the hantaviruses...the 
liquid helium...the embalming tools...the bone drill...those 
hamsters...put the hamsters down! PUT -THE- -HAMSTERS- *DOWN!* 
PUT-- <crackle of small arms fire>)


> > --
>     ^
> Your delimiter lost a space somewhere.
> 


My bad --anywhere else?


-Jeff


-- 
Jeff Huo | jeff@spundreams.net.nospam (remove nospam)
U. Michigan Med | http://www.spundreams.net/~jeff


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